STORM FRONT

By SFwriter

Saran City Blues
Aftermath

- Part 1–

Set after SF5.09 - A June to Remember

* * * * * * *

 

Dade Marcus had long left behind the only world he knew, the only home he'd ever lived in; Merlow.  He'd quickly found himself alone in a life that felt so jarringly unfamiliar that he had considered daily the prospect of going home with his head hanging in defeat.  Surely it wasn't too late to do that.  It couldn't be too late to do that.

Fretting, Dade stood up and started pacing in the small box apartment he'd found himself.  His new home, Saran City, was a concrete jungle in comparison to Merlow.  And it was here that Dade began to feel like a fish out of water.  A small fish in a big ocean.  He wanted to go back to his pond.

By all accounts, Saran City was beautiful in comparison to other metropolises.  Picturesque enough, green enough, straddling a great lake that made Lake Herren look like a small bay in comparison.  It was all just bigger.  Different and bigger.

"Not better though."  Dade whispered, "Just different."

Mike and Sarah had swapped out with Dade for living arrangements, and by their own admission, believed they were getting the better deal.  Still, it helped Dade to know he was living in a modest, humble apartment once occupied by loved ones. 

 Despite the initial rush of excitement Dade felt at being in Saran City, the novelty had already worn off.  He'd spent his first few days just wandering around, trying to familiarize himself with his surroundings.  He'd received enough get well calls to make him feel a little less isolated and lost in the big city, but now they'd all been done, he was starting to feel restless.

 "Well hello there, Spunky."

Dade smiled at the familiar name, expecting it to be spoken from an equally familiar face.  He turned around to see it was no one he knew at all.  Still, he gave the girl speaking it a nod of recognition as she stepped up to him.  She pinned a sticker on his chest and patted it.  He felt rather juvenile at having a sticker with his name pinned on his chest but went with it anyway.  After all, today was his first day at the local bridging school, where his main classes were all musically oriented.

Depending on how Dade looked at it, it was either an awesome opportunity, or a halfway house for high school dropouts on their way to working at the local fast food chain.  Hopefully it would be the former.

He was presently in a room surrounded by peers, most of whom already seemed to know each other.  This gave Dade an incredible sense of feeling out of place.  There was definitely an air of being somewhat out of his depth.  Everyone here seemed so advanced and on a level he wasn't sure he was at.

"And now we have . Dad Marcus.  No, I missed an e.  Dade Marcus."

Dade took a deep breath as his name was spoken by the woman who seemed to be in charge of proceedings.  He stood up, as everyone else had, hands fidgeting in his pockets.  He pulled them out and clasped them.

"My name is Dade, uhh, I come from a place called Merlow."

"Where?"  Someone asked, "Is that like a bottle of wine or something?  Can I have some?"

"Yeah kinda pronounced like that."  Dade said with an awkward smile, "Umm, so... a little bit about myself.  Well, like I said, I come from Merlow.  It's like this place, if it wasn't so big and ugly."

That remark got a chuckle.  Maybe the old cheeky wit would be useful after all.  It certainly helped break the ice.

"I have a little girl back home, and she's..."

The moment he said it he knew he shouldn't have.  The sudden silence and looks of judgment he received were swift and potent.  This pampered lot clearly didn't look kindly on that sort of thing.

The rest of the afternoon just seemed to go downhill after that for Dade, and he found himself at the back of all classes, on his own, with no one really standing out as a potential friend or confidant.  He very much felt like he'd been singled out as the class loser, deadbeat, or person that should be frowned upon and avoided.

It never came to the point where Dade felt he would be bullied, but he certainly wasn't being welcomed.  He got the strange impression that he'd be spending a lot of time alone here, and the first thought was that he should do an about face and retreat to Merlow.  Instead, he settled on rushing back to his apartment after class, opened up his laptop, and made a connection with a familiar set of faces.

"Dade!"  Claire smiled, waving June's hand at the screen, "Look, Sweetheart, it's Daddy."

Dade grinned back brightly, the first real joy he'd felt of the day, "My girls!"

"Oh, Dade, it's so nice to see you, Sweetheart."  Claire gushed, patting the screen affectionately as if it made Dade closer, "We really miss you.  Even Carl misses you."

"Yeah I bet he misses me every night he gets to give you the squeak."

Carl poked his head into view behind Claire, scrunching his nose and shaking his head, "I'm not sure I give her the squeak now she's used to you.  You might need to give me some pointers."

Dade smirked good naturedly at that, nodding his head, "Well if she gets bored, you can always send her out here to play with me for a while.  I don't mind making her squeak at all.  And I'm so good at it, you know?"

"Not a chance, Romeo."  Carl chuckled, "How are you settling in?  Is it going alright?"

"Carl!  This is my conversation!  Go and talk to Storm or something."  Claire said, pushing him out of shot and chuckling, "Dade, pretend I asked you that question.  Did I tell you we miss you?"

Oddly, it seemed that maybe Claire was right, even in June's case.  Dade's eyes were locked on his little girl as she bounced in Claire's lap, cooing happily.  She really did seem to recognize Dade and appreciate his presence.

"God, Claire, can I just rewind time, not be a better man and let you two go, and just keep my ass in Merlow where I belong?  This place sucks ass."  Dade vented suddenly.

"Whoop, serious conversation time!"  She said, raising June up for Carl to take.

The fact that Carl could hold his daughter immediately made Dade tense up.  While Dade realized it was his choice to leave Merlow, he thought he was doing it for the right reasons.  Not just for Claire and June, but for himself.  So that he would return home stronger, and so his girls would have a chance to build a stable life for themselves without him.

"Talk to me, Love.  What's wrong?"  Claire asked, "Do you want your girls to come out and visit?  Are you settled in enough please?"

"Are you kidding!?"  Dade gasped excitedly, "Can you be here in five minutes?  I'll cook!"

Claire giggled at that, "Oh, Sweetheart, I feel so... lonely for you, but I'm so proud of you too.  I know it might be hard right now, just like walking around high school with a giant mutant belly.  You'll settle eventually, and you'll do what you need to do, and then you'll come home and be with us again.  And the moment you're settled, June and I are coming right out."

"And Carl doesn't mind?"

"Carl doesn't have a choice, but he doesn't mind either.  You know how he is.  He's worried about you too.  Everyone is.  Even Brad is!"  Claire smiled, "He's been moping around, coming over to visit June and asking after you.  I think he misses us living at home with him, and misses you being there."

"He's okay though.  Maybe I'll fly him out here to spend a holiday here or something."

"Oh he'd love that.  But then Josh would miss him."

"Details!"  Dade said, grabbing a bottle of water and settling in to listen to this Merlow update, "Brad and Josh, fucking like bunnies?"

"Yeah... this is Josh we're talking about."

"Oh right, so smiles and distant, awkward, repressed waves?"

"Dade!"  Claire laughed, "Behave!"

"Oh come on, it's Josh.  We both know what he's like."

"He and Brad are kind of a... a thing now.  I do think Brad should come out to visit you though.  He has Mike around, but you and he are good buddies and... I don't know.  I'm not sure this is such a good thing, you know?"

"Think Brad's faking it?"

"I think maybe he could be, just because he wants to have someone.  Anyone.  He cares about Josh.  I just . I'm not sure yet.  Jury's still out."

"I'll bring him out for a holiday.  I miss having him around the place.  What about Lucas?  How's he doing?"

"Better."  Claire said, nodding her head, "Much, much better.  Storm calls a lot, checking in on his niece.  I think he's afraid that your side of the family will lose any influence now that I'm with Carl."

"Our side of the family?"  Dade smirked, "As in Storm and mine?"

"You know he loves you.  Aren't you two talking?"

"Not that much.  I mean, we saw each other before I left and . that really meant a lot, but . it's still not the same as it used to be.  I still don't feel like we're family again."

"Well, you two can work on that, and you have plenty of family here in Merlow."

"I love you, Dade!"  Carl called out.

Dade grinned, "I really wish he was more of a prick.  I wouldn't feel so bad then about masturbating to old memories of you squeaking."

"Dade!"  Claire gasped, blushing.

"Sue me.  You had my daughter.  It implies fucking."

"Oh, I suppose I'm used to it by now.  Anyway, look, I need to go and feed our little girl.  She's growing so fast.  I wish you were here to see."

"I wish I was too."  Dade said seriously, "Can I come back now?"

"No."  Claire said, shaking her head, "This is your time.  June and I will come out really soon, okay?"

"Bring lots of condoms."

"Cock repellent!"  Carl yelled, again from off screen.

Claire simply laughed at Dade's comment, "Never change, Sweetheart.  Never change.  I love you, June loves you, we all love you."

"Come soon?"

"We'll try, Baby.  We'll try."

The connection closed and Dade once again felt that familiar sense of being alone.  Right now he'd give anything to back in the Marcus house, holding Claire, watching their daughter.  As 'unjust' as their relationship might have seemed to others, it was one of the more fulfilling times of his life in recent history.  He loved Claire, and he missed being with her.

"Who can I call next?"  Dade asked himself, fretting again.

 

* * * * * * *

 

And so this pattern repeated itself for days and never seemed to ease up.  Dade was starting to feel more and more dependent on those who were no longer around him.  School continued to be a monotonous drag, and his calls to those he loved were becoming fewer and fewer in number as he didn't want to become a burden on them.  However, there was one person he hadn't called.

"Storm?  It's Dade."

"How did you get this number?"

Even though Dade knew this was a bit of a running joke with Storm now, he still cringed a little inside each time he heard it.  He knew it was Storm's way of putting distance between them, and it worked.  Still, Dade pressed on, hoping to one day have his brother be just that to him again, but without limit.  He knew these days that he could only press so much with Storm and that in itself was quite a depressing realization.

"Umm . how are you?"

"What do you want, Dade?"

"Talk?"

"I'm pretty busy right now."

"Can I call you back?"

"Hold on."

The entire exchange was stilted and awkward, and Dade wondered if he was wasting his time.  It was obvious Storm really didn't have much time for him, but for some reason Dade held on, still hoping things would change between them.  They'd had such a good time together in Merlow.  Surely that was a positive step?

"Don't call back.  I'm here now."  Storm said, "You just caught me at a bad time."

"Everything okay?"

"It's fine, Dade.  It's fine."

Awkward silences followed, with Dade biting his finger and wondering what to say next.  Is this how it would always be between them now?  Short, abrupt, terse conversations?

"Storm, would you come out and visit me?"  Dade asked, figuring he'd just go for the home run.

"Yeah look I'm pretty busy right now and..."

"I'll pay."

"I don't need your money that you don't have.  You can't live off what she left us forever.  Do you have a job yet?"

"Actually, I've got a couple of after school jobs lined up.  I have too much free time on my hands anyway, so I need to find something."

"Right.  Well how much do you need now then?"

"You want to give me something?"

"I've done this before myself, Dade.  How much money do you have left from what she left us?"

"Mom, Storm.  She was our Mom.  You can say it."  Dade sighed, "God, are you ever going to let me back in again?"

"I don't really want to have this conversation with you."

"Now?  Or ever?"

"What do you want from me?"

"Love."  Dade said simply, starting to tear up a little, "The way you used to.  I want us to be close the way we used to.  I want you to forgive me already.  I want you to come so I can cry on your shoulder and you can tell me everything is going to be alright.  I want us to be able to feel when the other is hurting.  I want it all, Storm.  Haven't I done anything to make you even consider it?"

"Dade..."  Storm sighed, pausing before he spoke again, "I really need to go, but I'll come out and visit you soon, okay?  And it'll just be you and me.  We'll... work on things."

"And you'll love me again forever and ever?"  Dade asked with a sniffle and a bright grin, "And ever and ever!?"

"Maybe."

"You're smiling, I can hear it!"

"I'm smiling."

"You love me."

"I love you."

 

* * * * * * *

 

"So, Dad... I mean, Dade.  What's it like coming into civilization where it's not cool to have a kid at your age?  Does your daughter know she has a daddy?"

Dade stopped in his tracks at the class doorway, sighing and turning to his tormentor.  This was new.  In Merlow nobody really messed with him because his reputation preceeded him.  It didn't here, obviously.  Still, as lonely and low as Dade felt these days, he sure didn't feel in the mood to tolerate being bullied.

"What's your name again?  I forgot because the smell of your hairspray is kinda making me woozy."  Dade said, stepping up to the older student, "Yes, I do have a daughter.  Yes, that might not be 'cool' to you.  But I'll make this point to you just once.  You can take your digs at me, but don't ever mention my daughter.  Ever.  I'm a Regionals champ.  I'm a second grade black belt.  All that means to you, is that the next time you mention my daughter, I will hurt you.  I will hurt you a very great deal.  My name's Dade Marcus.  Get to like me, I'm awesome."

With that, Dade gave the stunned student a wet smack on the lips, before he headed into class.  He smirked wryly to himself.  He probably would break some bones if the prick ever mentioned his daughter again, but he was hoping that he could use some charm offensive to make life easier for himself here.

Unfortunately for Dade, while his little incident did get most people off his case, it didn't really bring anyone closer to him.  He still spent most classes sitting alone as the hick with a baby back home.  Or as he was soon to discover, right here in Saran City.

"Dade Marcus?"  A familiar voice said.

The moment Dade heard the voice, he grinned like a loon, picked up his bags, and shot right out of the classroom.  Sure enough, there in the hallway talking to a staff member, were his two girls.  Claire Carlyle and baby June.  For Dade, this was Christmas.

"My beautiful, beautiful girls!"  Dade grinned, feeling no shame as he ran right to them.

He picked both Claire and June up in his arms, hugging them tightly.  He kissed Claire rather intensely, before snuggling up to his daughter.  He couldn't believe they were here.  He alternated kisses between both, feeling so very happy.

"We're so sorry to interrupt you here, but I forgot to save your apartment address in my phone and this was the only place I knew to find you."

Dade kissed her again, holding his lips to hers before he hugged her tightly, "I don't care about anything more than you two.  My girls are here.  My girls are here!"

 

* * * * * * *

 

Dade left school early with Claire and June, taking them to a local café so he could revel in their presence.  To anyone who didn't know them, they looked like a young family, older than they actually were.  The constant clasp of Dade's hand on Claire's made them look quite loved up.

"I am so glad you're here."  Dade said sincerely, getting a little emotional as he sat next to Claire enjoying an afternoon meal, "Both of you.  Just... it's amazing."

"Dade... we can't fuck."  Claire said with an apologetic smile, "I'm sorry."

"What!?  You mean Carl isn't into this new age sharing the love mentality?  I let him have you back for crying out loud!"

Claire laughed at that, squeezing Dade's hand, "Oh, Dade.  I miss you so much."

"God, Claire."  Dade said rather intensely, "I miss you more than I even thought I would.  You and June, you're just... you're all I think about since I left.  I miss you.  I miss us, being a family.  I feel so alone here, and... if it's even possible, I feel like I love you more now than I did when we were together."

"You know, I do talk to Carl about this.  I love him.  I really love him.  And in a perfect world, maybe we had something special.  But I do think having June changed things a little.  He still loves me, but I think the reality of playing Dad is starting to dawn on him.  He does a great job, but how fair is it to him, you know?"

"He loves you, and I love him for loving you, and my little girl.  But if you two ever decide it's not for you, then I'm ready to make you squeak, anytime you like."  Dade smiled softly, "I'm not sure I'll ever be able to have another girl after you.  I miss my girls."

"But if you were back in Merlow, would you feel the same?"

"All I think about lately, is the time you and I spent living in that house together, playing family.  It wasn't an act for me.  I know it wasn't ideal either.  I'm not naïve about that.  But since losing it, I... realize how very much I... wanted it.  If I could, I'd have you and June back, Claire.  Back in Merlow."

Claire looked down, nodding her head as if in shame, "I... I..."

"You love Carl, but you still think about me too?"

Claire raised her head and looked right at Dade, "I think the Claire he fell in love with didn't have a kid.  It's been good, but... little things make me... feel like he feels a little sad that... you know."

"And that is so understandable."  Dade said, agreeing, "So let him free and come and live with me and we can be a family!"

"Dade, it's not at that point.  He loves me and he really, oh my goodness, really loves this little girl."

"But she's my little girl."  Dade said, almost petulantly, "And I want her with me.  And I want you with me."

"But I'm not the love of your life, Dade."  Claire said softly.

"Yeah well, I think that whole mentality is a little overrated now.  I just think you sometimes end up with what you've got.  It's not starry eyed love, but so what?  It's still real.  It's real to me.  Just... think about it, okay?  Think about us."

 

* * * * * * *

 

"And then Daddy beat the giant prickastudent up and everyone in the fair land of school lived happily ever after."  Dade said, chuckling softly as he held his little girl, "Daddy's just kidding, Sweetheart.  You should never beat people up, unless it's for sport or because you really feel like they deserve it.  Okay?"

"Dade, I hope you aren't teaching her any bad habits."  Claire said as she stepped out of the bathroom, dressed in her pyjamas.

The apartment was quite small, and nothing like the large Marcus house the two had shared in Merlow.  It was essentially a studio, so privacy was lacking.  Still, Dade liked that in this case as it made the apartment feel cosy and just right for his young family.

"I put her cot next to the bed so she's close to you."  Dade said, "I'll sleep on the floor between you."

"Why don't you sleep on the sofa?  You know if it wasn't for Carl, I'd ."

"I know, I know."  Dade said, "But we better not tempt fate.  I know you wouldn't be able to keep your hands off me."

Claire giggled at that, "Just bring the sofa closer?"

"Nah, it's fine.  I've got a roll out mattress I can put on the floor.  I want to sleep between my girls."

Claire settled on Dade's bed, while Dade set his own up on the floor between her and the cot.  He was feeling particularly happy right now.  For starters, it was nice just having company.  It was also wonderful to have his daughter so close again, and to have Claire as well.  Relationship confusion aside, the two were still great friends and Claire had a very comforting presence.

"This is really nice."  Dade said as he snuggled his pillow, facing toward the bed, "Thank you for coming.  I wouldn't have even minded if you brought Carl."

"I didn't want things to be awkward or for you to feel like a third wheel, or an outsider with your own daughter.  It's better this way."

Dade raised his hand up onto the bed, grateful when Claire reacted by taking it.  The two held hands in the dark for a while, until Dade felt himself start to drift off.  He was surprised when Claire spoke up, breaking the silence with her soft voice.

"You know, if we were newlyweds, this apartment would be just perfect."

Dade smiled at that thought, "Early days yet..."

 

* * * * * * *

 

Dade's time with his two girls passed by far too quickly for his liking, and before he knew it, he was once more alone in his apartment.  Their visit had given him a boost, and allowed him to accept that if given the chance, he would probably try and get his family back together.  It wasn't the ideal situation when their relationship began, but after letting Claire go and being away from his girls, he couldn't think of anything in life now that he wanted more.

"Funny how that works."  Dade sighed to himself, staring at a photo of himself with his girls as he rode the train home from school.

Unfortunately for Dade, his small glimmer of hope that he might get to reconcile his family was quickly nixed when he received an email from Claire saying that she and Carl were going to continue their relationship.  The fact it came in an email was perhaps the worst for Dade, but he knew Claire would've been too emotional to do it over a face to face conversation.

For days after receiving her email, Dade didn't contact Claire.  This cut one of his main sources of interaction and made him feel even more isolated.  He simply didn't know what he would say to her when they did speak, or how long it would take to overcome this awkward development.

He managed to find himself a part time job teaching guitar at the local community hall, which in turn exposed him to some children who might benefit from his skills as a martial artist.  He started his own small set of classes, three times a week with just a few students.  Between his two part time jobs, he barely made enough to cover his child support, and he silently praised his mother for the insurance money she'd left to him.  It was large enough that he still had a few years left at least to find himself a steady career.

Now Dade was starting to settle into life in Saran City and found parts of it that quite inspired and interested him.  Small hubs of the city.  Parks, cafes, and a myriad of other places that he would stumble upon through his regular weekend adventures.

Still, even though he'd started to find a routine for himself of school, his teaching jobs, and his exploring excursions, he still found himself quite lonely.  He hadn't made many friends at school past bare acquaintances.  His main interactions were now with his students, but being quite a few years younger than Dade, there wasn't much in common to speak of.

"I feel like I barely exist to anyone anymore."  Dade sighed, talking to a duck of all things, "And now I'm sitting next to a pond, talking to you."

The duck quacked loudly, before Dade tossed it a piece of bread.  The ducks seemed to like that.  It kept them around for him to talk to, at least.

"I wonder if I died right now, would it really make any difference to anyone's lives?  Since they all seem to be doing so good without me.  Or they all have their own lives."  Dade continued, "I respect that Claire's giving it another go with Carl.  I bet they're doing just fine playing happy families.  Storm's off doing god knows what with himself.  I wouldn't know because he never ever calls me and when I manage to catch him, he barely grunts through our conversations.  Marcel's, well, less said the better.  He's happy at least.  Then there's Mike and Sarah.  I'm sure they're happy.  I hope they're happy.  At least they call to nag me and make sure I'm looking after myself.  Dad and Abby call sometimes, which is nice.  Abby thinks I should've stayed with Claire.  She thinks a lot of things.  Are you listening to me, Duck?"

Another quack, another toss offering of bread.  Dade knew he better hurry up before the duck stopped being hungry and wandered off.

"Anyway.  They're all just doing their own thing and I don't know why I matter anymore.  If I wasn't here, Claire would raise June with Carl and she'd probably be the happiest little girl in the world.  Storm would carry on being a grumpy bastard who can't forgive me.  They'd all just . get on with it, you know?  What's the..."

Dade stopped mid sentence when he realized his friend had wandered off.  He knew things were rough when he couldn't even get a duck to hang around and listen to him.

"You know what, Duck?  I'm going to go and eat some Peking Duck now!"  Dade yelled after it, before he stood up to leave.

 

* * * * * * *

 

When Dade returned to his apartment later that evening, he realized the door was unlocked.  Immediately suspicious, Dade quietly opened the door to scan for intruders.  The apartment was dark, but Dade caught the flicker of a shadow moving and instantly knew someone was there.

Before Dade had a chance to act, a fist seemed to come out of nowhere and struck him in the chest.  Only his quick reflexes prevented the strike from doing any damage.  Instantly he was struggling with the intruder, fighting and parrying a series of strikes and attacks.  Attacks he soon realized were far too precise to belong to a thug.

Dade attempted to rush for the wall to turn on the light switch, but that only earned him a kick to the back of the head, knocking him into the wall.  A stiff punch to his lower back and then a body pressed against his, pinning him to the wall, ended the duel.

"Fuck you, Storm!"  Dade gasped, "What's your fucking problem?"

"Just reminding you who the best is, Little man."

"Jesus, what the fuck are you doing in here?"

"Got a key off Mike and Sarah."

Dade brushed himself off and turned the light on, before facing his brother.  He rubbed the back of his head and frowned at Storm, clearly annoyed by the impromptu sparring match.

"You came all this way just to beat me up?"  Dade asked, figuring a slight skirmish was the closest he'd get to a hug hello from his brother.

"I told you I'd come.  I came."

"Well, do I get a fucking hug or what?  Geez."  Dade cursed, shoving Storm in the chest, "You can't do that.  I could've killed you.  I knew it was you eventually, but still."

"You're just pissed I beat you."

"You didn't beat me.  I stopped mid fight, to turn on the light.  So really it's a draw."

"I hope you don't mind.  I've already made myself at home."  Storm said, flopping down onto the bed.

"You're rude."  Dade said, still upset over their first encounter, "Where's my fucking hug already?"

"Dade, are you really upset?"  Storm asked with a slight smirk on his face.

"You are such an asshole, Storm.  Fucking asshole."

"I try."

"Yeah well, I'm making me a sandwich and then I'm going up to the roof to get some air and cool off."

Dade could tell his brother seemed surprised.  Surprised that Dade really was upset.  Though for Dade it was more because he'd been so lonely for so long and that this surprise visit should've been given more warmth and spirit than it had been.  A sparring session was simply Storm's way of avoiding any awkward greetings.  And that's what really pissed Dade off right now.  After being alone for so long, Dade wanted a real greeting.  Not stupid mind games and chest beating contests.

Dade made two sandwiches, leaving Storm's on the bench top, "You can sit there and be an asshole while I go up top."

By the time Dade made it up to the roof and stepped out into the open air, he was already crying.  He bit into his sandwich and moved closer to the edge, his tears falling a little freer.  He didn't even know his brother anymore.  Probably the one person who could make everything better for him, just completely disregarded him now.  Dade had held onto their brief, but positive reunion in Merlow as a ray of hope for the future, but tonight just seemed like one giant backwards step again. 

"Guess you still know me, huh, Dade?"  Storm asked with a sigh, stepping out onto the roof beside Dade.

The two brothers stared out over the night skyline together, eating their sandwiches and remaining silent for a time.  Dade sniffled but had other recovered from his brief moment of emotional release.

"Why'd you come all this way if you're just going to play games, Storm?  Just more excuses for you to fucking hate on me.  Keep me at a distance.  Remind me you're better.  You won the Nationals, alright?  You're the best.  You've proven it.  I've been all on my own for so long, and I've been hoping and hoping you might come and visit me one day and all I realize now is that even when you do come, you're not going to cut me any slack.  You're just going to keep up this shit of holding me at arm's length."

"Dade, it was stupid, okay?  But... don't make it all... awkward."

"I can't take this right now, Storm."  Dade said, taking the last bite of his sandwich, "Why can't you just get over it?  I served my time."

"Don't go there, Dade."  Storm said, almost a warning in his voice, "I mean it."

"Oh, Storm.  I'm fed up.  We're going there.  We're going there tonight."

Dade turned and met his brother's eyes.  It was almost like the moment their eyes met on the mat during the regionals.  The moment during the final match when they both knew something had changed.  That they were about to push the match to another level and wouldn't be able to come back from it.

"Are we?"  Storm asked, suddenly shoving Dade in the chest with no holding back, "Is that what you want?"

"What, Storm?  You want to fight for real this time?"  Dade asked, "Because you're still too cowardly to show some fucking emotion toward me?  Huh?"

Dade knew he could have easily shoved Storm back and baited him into another fight, which no doubt would have been far more brutal than their earlier sparring match.  It had been coming for a long time.  This final confrontation that Dade was forcing between them.  As lonely as Dade had been lately, he felt he had nothing to lose by trying to force Storm to confront the issues between them.

"I don't need this."  Storm said, shaking his head and turning to leave, "Fuck off and die, Dade.  Just make sure to get it right this time."

Dade stung at those words, his eyes tearing up as he yelled after his brother, "Maybe I will then!  Maybe I'll fucking do it for real this time!"

Storm turned on Dade in an instant, almost growling.  He pointed to the edge of the roof behind Dade, as if goading him.  When he reached Dade, he slapped him across the face with so much force that Dade almost fell backwards.  The contempt in the hit was palpable.

"Then why don't you just fucking jump for real this time?"  Storm yelled at Dade, the ferocity in his voice causing Dade to step backwards, "I almost killed myself trying to save you last time.  Why should I bother again?  You killed my mother!"

"She was my mother too!"

"Only because your Dad raped her!"

Dade broke at the words coming out of his brother's mouth.  His heart hurt so much that he barely felt the force of Storm's fist smacking into his face.  He doubled over, getting a kick to the back of the knees, knocking him to the ground.  Sobbing, Dade tried to push himself up, only to receive a kick to the chest that knocked him onto his back.

"To think I let a fool like you almost destroy me."  Storm said, kicking Dade again as he crawled along the ground, "You don't matter to me anymore, Dade.  You don't mean anything to me.  I see you crawling and feel nothing except the urge to kick you more."

"Storm!"  Dade yelled, sobbing, his face a bloody mess, "Please!  I love you!"

"Yeah well, I hate you."  Storm cursed, picking Dade up by the back of his pants and shirt, "I hate you.  Every time I look at you I just think of how I wish it was you dead in the ground instead of her.  You took her away from me, Dade.  You ruined my life by existing.  You ruined my life by being born.  You were a dark seed waiting to sprout, and when you did, you took her away from me."

"Storm, I just want to make it right.  Please!  Please!"

"You're making it right, Dade."  Storm whispered in Dade's ear, still holding him up near the edge of the rooftop, "Very soon it'll all be over.  The biggest mistake I ever made was saving you on that bridge.  Chances are, if you died that day, I'd have never known the truth about you, and still thought you were the greatest little brother in the world.  Even better, I would've still had my mother.  The world would have just been so much better if you didn't exist anymore.  So I'm fixing it now.  And tell me something, Dade.  Who the fuck is ever going to miss you?  Not even your own daughter will."

With that, Storm gave Dade the final shove toward the edge that left him teetering on the edge.  He adjusted his shirt and started walking away.  Dade was barely able to stand, still sobbing profusely when Storm turned back to him.

"You know the difference between Lucas and I, Storm?"  Dade asked, broken hearted as he turned to face his brother, "Mine is never for show.  I hope I rot in hell!"

The last few words seemed to stifle a hint of emotion in Storm's eyes before Dade spread his arms and let himself fall backwards over the edge.  He fell like some broken angel, wings far too damaged to ever fly again.  So he fell.  He fell, and he fell, until he could fall no more.

 

* * * * * * *

To Be Continued

Dade gets a visit from someone who grants him his wish and helps him to realize how special he is.